Number
|
Name
|
1
|
Case study
|
2
|
Film script
|
3
|
In class writing
|
4
|
Annotated
bibliography
|
Introduction.
Through out the school year, I realized that writting lab is a really useful and interesting subject. I have earned lots of writting skills, analyzing skills and more.My writting skill is at another level now. I feel grateful for being able to study in this class and i have never regretted for choosing this subject. I have tried my best to get high grade in this subject however I always forgot my homework and assignments on due days. As a student writer , my future goal is to become a popular children 'sbook writer and make 1 million dollars per year.
Case study
Essay #2: Case Study
|
Thursday, 15 March: rough draft in class for peer review
Friday, 23 March: final draft due to Edmodo before midnight
Instructions:
A case study is an intensive research project that involves
describing an individual case or person within a larger context. It is
regularly used in psychology, anthropology and other social sciences. For our
purposes, it is a type of personal interview essay.
For this assignment, you will identify some sort of social
problem or issue occurring here at AIS or in Ho Chi Minh City and interview a
person whose personal experience illustrates the issue in order to gain new
insight. For example, you could write about cyberbullying and interview a
classmate who has suffered from it in the past to get his or her unique
perspective. Because of the potential sensitivity of some of these issues, I
would like you to create a pseudonym or false identity for your source.
Once you’ve interviewed your subject, you will then write an
approximately three-page essay in MLA format describing the social issue you’ve
chosen and your source’s relationship to the topic with at least five direct
quotes from your interview with appropriate MLA citations and a works cited
page.
Format:
·
Introduction: Provide appropriate background information about the topic and end the
paragraph with a thesis statement explaining who you interviewed, when and
where the interview was conducted and what you hoped to discover from the
interview.
·
Body: Group the information you learned in your interview thematically, focus
on three or four big themes or things you learned from the interview and
explain each in its own paragraph using quotes as support.
·
Conclusion: Summarize the overall main theme or what you learned from the
interview and provide some concluding remarks or final thoughts about the
social issue.
Grading:
This assignment is worth 100 pts. You will be evaluated on
conventions, MLA format, organization and relation to the specifics of the
assignment.
Additional
Information:
It’s unnecessary to
list every question and answer from the interview during the essay here. Focus
on important information that provides some interesting insight into the social
issue. Avoid writing “For question #1, I asked…and he answered…” Instead, write
something like “When asked what he thought about…he answered…” For this
assignment, it is OK to use personal pronouns.
Nowadays, there are many problems
in the world that affects teenagers. And one of them is gaming addiction. [js2] 3 days ago, I
have interviewed Sulan in our school AIS about gaming addiction. He agreed that
he is a addict for a long time. We were discussing about his problem, and I
think this is a very helpful interview. Sulan was stuck in this game world and
he still have not known how to get rid of it.[js3]
Sulan has a
big problem about his gaming addition and everybody knows it. Even in school,
in class and in the toilet, he plays game and doesn’t think about consequences.
He never does homework, because all the time he spends are in video games. He
sleeps 3 hours per day and the other time is for video games. Teachers keep giving him advices but he
doesn’t listen. The school had invited his parents many times but I think he is
not afraid. To Sulan, video games are
every thing to him. He has spent more than 500 US dollars on this game. Many
his friends give him advices but he did not apply. His school time,
relationship and his life become worse. Now, he is having no friends anymore,
students in AIS call him a loser. He says when he is getting older he will
change. But that is till an unclear statement, that depends on his behavior. [js4]
Finally,
Sulan has a serious issue that really affects his life. So this is an example
that can warn people who already has gaming addiction or almost have gaming
addiction. In conclusion, you are the people who decide how’s your life go[js5] .
[js2]Give
a little more detail here. Because this needs to be a longer essay (2.5 to 3
pages), you have the time to include more information. What is gaming
addiction? What are the symptoms?
[js3]You
have good information here, but you should try to combine it into a clearer
thesis statement, something like, “I interviewed an AIS student named Sulan who
has been a gaming addict along time to find out about his problem and ways out
of it.”
[js4]You
have good information here too, but you need to break this up into 2-3 body
paragraphs with their own topic sentences and supporting information. You need
to include at least five direct quotes too. You could discuss.
1.
How or
why Sulan became a gaming addict
2.
How being an addict has affected him (grades,
personal life, etc.)
3.
How he thinks he can break this addiction.
[js5]Your
conclusion isn’t bad. Add some of your own opinion about gaming addiction. Feel
free to offer solutions. All of this will help you make your essay longer.
[js6]Also
include a works cited page
Name:
|
Perry Bui
|
Assignment:
|
Case Study
|
Date:
|
23 March 2012
|
Title:
|
Untitled
|
4 – Exceptional
|
3 - Capable
|
2 - Developing
|
1 - Beginning
|
|
Ideas= 3
|
Essayidentifies
a social issue and uses information from a personal interview to support a
unique perspective.
|
Essay includes information from a
personal interview and relates it to a main idea with occasional problems
with relevance.
|
Essay
includes information from a personal interview without much sense of a main
idea or overall purpose.
|
Essay
lacking a personal interview or any unifying theme, main idea, relevance
purpose difficult to understand.
|
Organization = 2
|
Introduction,
body and conclusion work together to enhance meaning and follow specifics on
assignment sheet.
|
Introduction,
body and conclusion identifiable but occasionally lacking in purpose and
overall main idea.
|
Introduction, body and conclusion
present but containing problems in relation to assignment guidelines.
|
Basic
organizational structure missing, undefined or difficult to identify.
|
Quotations = 1
|
Five
direct quotes which work to illustrate specific themes and relate to the main
idea, providing support and clarity.
|
Five
direct quotes related to main idea with occasional problems in purpose and
relevance.
|
Fewer
than five direct quotes, quotes included without appropriate analysis or
relation to main idea.
|
Little to no attempt at using quotes,
quotes difficult to understand, relation to main idea nonexistent.
|
Format = 2
|
Document
set up effectively, quotationsand works cited page formatted correctly
according to MLA format.
|
Document
set up more or less correctly, quotations and works cited page in basic MLA
format with occasional errors.
|
Problems with spacing, indentation,
font on document, sources cited with multiple errors.
|
No
recognizable format, citations nonexistent or incomprehensible, little to no
attempt made.
|
Conventions =3
|
Very
few errors; little editing required; conventions are used correctly and
effectively overall; meaning clear.
|
Reasonable control over standard
conventions; spelling, punctuation usually correct; grammar inconsistent.
|
Errors
common but not interfering with meaning; grammar conversational; simple
conventions mostly correct.
|
Repeated
errors make text difficult to understand; punctuation, capitalization random
or nonexistent.
|
Comments:
|
It seems that you didn’t make
any changes from your rough draft to your final draft. This is an especially
big problem because your rough draft was not nearly good enough to be
resubmitted. There’s no real MLA format, no direct quotations, it has many
errors and it’s too short and the body consists of one paragraph that doesn’t
reveal much in terms of the interview. I have no choice but to grade what I
have and hope that you’ll take time management and writing assignments more
seriously in the future.
|
Grade:
|
3 + 2 + 1 + 2 + 3 = 11/20 (55%
F)
|
Final draft
Nowadays, there are many problems
in the world that affects teenagers. And one of them is gaming addiction. 3
days ago, I have interviewed Sulan, an Ais student named Sulan and he his in
grade 9, who has been a gaming addict along time to find out about his problem
and ways out of it. He agreed that he is a addict for a long time. We were
discussing about his problem, and I think this is a very helpful interview.Sulan
was stuck in this game world and he still have not known how to get rid of it.
Sulan has a
big problem about his gaming addition and everybody knows it. Last year, he was
a very excellent and popular student in school, but somehow he was seduced by
his friends in his hamlet. Even in
school, in class and in the toilet, he plays game and doesn’t think about
consequences. He never does homework, because all the time he spends are in
video games. He sleeps 3 hours per day and the other time is for video games. Teachers keep giving him advices but he
doesn’t listen. The school had invited his parents many times but I think he is
not afraid. To Sulan, video games are every thing to him. He has spent more
than 500 US dollars on this game. Many his friends give him advices but he did
not apply. His school time, relationship and his life become worse. Now, he is
having no friends anymore, students in AIS call him a loser. He says when he is
getting older he will change and he hope he will break this dangerous addiction.
But that is till an unclear statement, that depends on his behavior.
Finally,
Sulan has a serious issue that really affects his life. So this is an example
that can warn people who already has gaming addiction or almost have gaming
addiction. In conclusion, you are the people who decide how’s your life go[js1] .
[js1]Your
conclusion isn’t bad. Add some of your own opinion about gaming addiction. Feel
free to offer solutions. All of this will help you make your essay longer.
[js2]Also
include a works cited page
4 – Exceptional
|
3 - Capable
|
2 - Developing
|
1 - Beginning
|
|
Sources
|
8 appropriate academic sources,
four of which come from academic journals.
|
8 sources, consisting of four
academic journals and four mostly academic sources.
|
8 sources, which consist of a
random mixture of academic and nonacademic sources.
|
Fewer than eight sources or
little to no attempt to find academic sources.
|
Summary
|
100-word summary paragraphs for
each source, clearly summarizing main ideas and relevant information.
|
Summary paragraphs for each
source with occasional problems with word count or relevance to main idea.
|
Summary paragraphs lacking
clarity or relevance, containing far too many or too few words.
|
Summary paragraphs missing,
undeveloped or difficult to understand.
|
Evaluation
|
100-word evaluation paragraphs
for each source, expressing and supporting an opinion of each source.
|
Evaluation paragraphs for each
source with occasional problems with word count or relevance of opinion.
|
Evaluation paragraphs lacking
clarity or relevance, containing far too many or too few words.
|
Evaluation paragraphs missing,
undeveloped or difficult to understand.
|
Format
|
Document set up effectively, citations
formatted correctly according to MLA format.
|
Document set up more or less
correctly, 8 sources cited in basic MLA format with occasional errors.
|
Problems with spacing,
indentation, font on document, sources cited with multiple errors.
|
No recognizable format, citations
nonexistent or incomprehensible, little to no attempt made.
|
Conventions
|
Very few errors; little editing
required; conventions are used correctly and effectively overall; meaning
clear.
|
Reasonable control over
standard conventions; spelling, punctuation usually correct; grammar
inconsistent.
|
Errors common but not
interfering with meaning; grammar conversational; simple conventions mostly
correct.
|
Repeated
errors make text difficult to understand; punctuation, capitalization random
or nonexistent.
|
rough draft of annotation 1
Chosen topic : tobacco health impact
Currie, Donya, Surgeon general's
report highlights new tobacco health impact
findings, Nation’s
health , Feb 2011 , Vol. 41, Issue 1.[js1]
This article
talks about how does tobacco affect smokers, some key points of this article
are tobacco contains lots of compounds and toxics that can lead to cancer and
the body’s inability to heal the damage that cause by tobacco such as cellular
damage and tissue inflammation. The other consequences of tobacco are reduced
fertility in women, cancers of the esophagus, lung, stomach, pancreas, kidney
and bladder and coronary heart disease. And lastly, it contains a big amount of
nicotine, a chemical that causes addition.[js2] [js3]
Donya
Currie is a journalist and fiction writer, she normally writes about health. Therefore, we
may assume that she has expertise according to the topic, tobacco health
impacts. She summarized this and highlighted the new finding from the report "How
Tobacco Smoke Causes Disease:
The Biology and Behavioral Basis for Smoking-Attributable Disease, A Report of
the Surgeon General." Which is posted on www.surgeongeneral.gov[js4] .
As this website belongs to the government of USA which makes the article more
credible. [js5]
[js1]Not
quite MLA. You need a hanging indent, 12 pt font, “quotation marks” around the
name of the title and italics for the
name of the publication.
[js3]I’ve
highlighted errors in grammar and usage. We’ll have time in class if you need
help fixing any of them.
[js5]This
is good. You’ll just need to add a little bit to make it closer to 100 words.
the rough drafts of annotations 2-4 with
feedback
How Tobacco Ads Target Teens. Current Health 2 (Teacher's Edition), 0196061X,
Apr/May2002, Vol. 28, Issue 8
This article talks about how important are teenage consumers to tobacco
industries. It also discusses about health problems caused by tobacco, for
example: cancer, stroke, bronchitis, pneumonia, emphysema, and
increased risk of miscarriage, premature birth, and SIDS for babies
of women who smoke.The next part gives some activities for students to
understand better how tobacco appears in advertisements as well as the issue
about tobacco, for example: evaluate billboard and video messages in a similar
way.
It is a useful topic for teenagers and all the people in the world. This article
broadly talks about some of health problems without giving clear explanation.
However, the information is useful, it quite lists all the health issue relating to
tobacco.
MMWR: Morbidity & Mortality Weekly Report, 9/10/2010, Vol. 59
Issue 35, p1141-1146, 6p, 2 Charts, 1 Graph
Secondhand exposure to tobacco smoke causes heart disease and lung cancer in
nonsmoking adults and sudden infant death syndrome, acute respiratory infections,
middle ear disease, exacerbated asthma, respiratory symptoms, and decreased lung
function in children. Nearly all nonsmokers who live with someone who smokes
inside their home are exposed to secondhand smoke. Health-care providers should
educate patients and parents about the dangers of secondhand smoke and follow
clinical care guidelines to help smokers quit.
After I read this article, I realized lots of important information that is needed for my
current life. I think I will tell everybody as many as I can to keep the distance with the
smokers. Secondhand smokers have to bear the same negative health impact just like
smokers or even worse.
Jayalekshmi, P. A.Gangadharan, P.Akiba, S.Nair, R. R. K.Tsuji,
M.Rajan, B.Tobacco chewing and female oral cavity cancer risk in
Karunagappally cohort, India, British Journal of Cancer, 3/10/2009, Vol.
100 Issue 5, p848-852, 5p, 5 Charts.
The study discusses about the relationship about female chewers and oral
cancers. They stated some of the methods and comparison to the female non-tobacco
chewers. The result showed that those chew tobacco and those have low incomes
have higher risk of getting oral cancer relating to mouth and tongue.
I think this study is very detailed; it has enough words and numbers. Tobacco
is extremely severe that can kill people. Anyway, female and male in world should
not use tobacco as a game.
Final draft
1. Chosen topic : Issues related to tobacco.
Currie, Donya, Surgeon
general's report highlights new tobacco health impact
findings, Nation’s health , Feb 2011 , Vol. 41, Issue 1.
This article
talks about how does tobacco affect smokers, some key points of this article
are tobacco contains lots of compounds and toxics that can lead to cancer and
the body’s inability to heal the damage that cause by tobacco such as cellular
damage and tissue inflammation. The other consequences of tobacco are reduced
fertility in women, cancers of the esophagus, lung, stomach, pancreas, kidney
and bladder and coronary heart disease. And lastly, it contains a big amount of
nicotine, a chemical that causes addition.
Donya
Currie is a journalist and fiction writer, she normally writes about health.
Therefore, we may assume that she has expertise according to the topic, tobacco
health impacts. She summarized this and highlighted the new finding from the
report "How Tobacco Smoke Causes Disease:
The Biology and Behavioral Basis for Smoking-Attributable Disease, A Report of
the Surgeon General." Which is posted on www.surgeongeneral.gov.
As this website belongs to the government of USA which makes the article more
credible.
2.How Tobacco Ads Target Teens. Current
Health 2 (Teacher's Edition), 0196061X, Apr/May2002, Vol. 28, Issue 8
This article talks about how important
are teenage consumers to tobacco industries. It also discusses about health
problems caused by tobacco, for example: cancer,
stroke, bronchitis, pneumonia, emphysema, and increased risk of miscarriage,
premature birth, and SIDS for babies of women who smoke.The next part
gives some activities for students to understand better how tobacco appears in
advertisements as well as the issue about tobacco, for example: evaluate
billboard and video messages in a similar way.
It is a useful topic for teenagers and
all the people in the world. This article broadly talks about some of health
problems without giving clear explanation. However, the information is useful,
it quite lists all the health issue relating to tobacco.
3. Jayalekshmi, P.
A.Gangadharan, P.Akiba, S.Nair, R. R. K.Tsuji, M.Rajan, B.Tobacco chewing and female
oral cavity cancer risk in Karunagappally cohort, India, British Journal of Cancer, 3/10/2009, Vol. 100 Issue 5, p848-852, 5p, 5 Charts.
The
study discusses about the relationship about female chewers and oral cancers.
They stated some of the methods and comparison to the female non-tobacco
chewers. The result showed that those chew tobacco and those have low incomes
have higher risk of getting oral cancer relating to mouth and tongue.
I think
this study is very detailed; it has enough words and numbers. Tobacco is
extremely severe that can kill people. Anyway, female and male in world should
not use tobacco as a game.
4. Jayalekshmi, P.
A.Gangadharan, P.Akiba, S.Nair, R. R. K.Tsuji, M.Rajan, B.Tobacco chewing and female
oral cavity cancer risk in Karunagappally cohort, India, British Journal of Cancer, 3/10/2009, Vol. 100 Issue 5, p848-852, 5p, 5 Charts.
The
study discusses about the relationship about female chewers and oral cancers.
They stated some of the methods and comparison to the female non-tobacco
chewers. The result showed that those chew tobacco and those have low incomes
have higher risk of getting oral cancer relating to mouth and tongue.
I think
this study is very detailed; it has enough words and numbers. Tobacco is
extremely severe that can kill people. Anyway, female and male in world should
not use tobacco as a game.
In class writing.
1.
Today is April 10,
this is a lucky day of my life. I have sold almost my hand-made toys. I’m
feeling so happy and proud of my self because that’s my clear money that I have
received from selling not yelling from my parents to get the money. If every
day I can get good lucks like this then one day I will have enough money to pay
the school’s fee to go to school and graduated and find a job. Yesterday was a horrible day, I could not
sell any products and I was starving for a day. And I know that may be the bad
luck had gone away and the good luck had come to me. And I think about my self,
2 weeks ago, I was a very popular player in the night, I went to the bar,
karaoke, shisha , smoking and many bad things. But now I’m a homeless guy, with
no love, no money I have to stay alive by my own hands. I feel so regret
because I was fighting with my parents so they kicked me out from the house. So
from now on, I will try my best to be a useful person to the society and making
money and prove to my parents that I have learned a lesson after those
problems. I love my family so much
2.
Opinion
essay.
Nowadays,
supernatural phenomena regularly are discussed in media. Too many scientists
and academics do not believe and think it is unscientific. In my opinion, many
people in the world are using media, technology in order to represent something
that can’t be explained or to ease the topic for the readers or watchers. And
sometimes it might not show enough information or the people just edited it the
way they want to. But this problem is very popular in many countries in the
world, included Vietnam. People keep entertaining this problem, and it grows up
very fast. So this is still a problem that people still not explain detail. SO,
how about you?
Movie script
“THE GIRL THAT WE ALL LOVE”( draft)
“THE GIRL THAT WE ALL LOVE”
EXT. STREET – MORNING
TOM
rides his bicycle and introduces himself and his friend. TOM passes DAN. A
beautiful morning
EXT. PHU MY HUNG
TOM
(Tom
slaps Dan’s head, laughing)
Morning
Dude!
DAN:
(pissed
off voice)
Ma,
thang cho
TOM
(Yell
out loud)
Hahahaha,
go to school fast bro.
INT. CAFETERIA - MORNING
Tom – chil is eating breakfast – tom
past by and steals it.
Tom
(laughing)
Hey
let me eat it for you Chill!
Chill
(chase
after Tom, crying, screaming)
No
give it back!
Tom
(drive
fatster and yell)
Drive
faster or else I will eat it all, BAHAHAHA
Chill
(angry
yell)
Ma
give it back Tom, I’m not kidding
Tom
(driving
faster)
See
you at school
SCENE 2 – EXT. Around School
SLO THROW A BALL INTO TOM’S HEAD
Slo
throws a ball into Tom’s head
Tom
(pissed
off scream)
Du
ma! You are so going to die.
Slo
(run
away)
Try
it. HAHAHA
Tom
(chase
after Slo)
If
I catch you, you will die Slo
INT.
CLASS -
Tom
(thinking)
everyone in our group likes this girl
Been, she’s kinda pretty though. We own have our own way to flirt with her
Slo try to impress her with his talent
of basketball every day
Dan tries to impress her with his
weird technique and talent of playing music like piano, etc
Chill impresses by acting like an
intelligent guy, a “sir”. Purposely forget his book to borrow Been and invite
to a concert.
And me. I don’t flirt with her.
SCENCE 4 – IN MATH CLASS
Tom, Slo, Dan, Chill
play video game in class.
Tom:
(whisper)
Hey,
what round are you guy on?
Dan:
(Whisper,
answer)
5
Chill:
(whisper,
answer)
2
Slo:
(Whisper,
answer)
7
Tom:
(whisper, giggle)
10,
Bitches
Teacher:
(angrily
scream)
What
is so funny Tom?
Tom:
(answer)
ermmm,
nothing teacher
Teacher:
Come
up here and find the X for this problem Tom.
Tom:
(walking
up the board, circle the X)
Here
is the X teacher.
Teacher:
(pissed)
Are
you kidding me Tom? Go to the principle office, NOW!
Tom:
Ok
ok!
Tom
walking down the principal office and laughing, after few minutes, principal
walks up with Tom to the classroom.
Principal:
(talk
to the teacher)
I
want Tom to sit in front of Been so she can take care of Tom and helps him to
be better.
Teacher:
Ok!
Been Move your bag one seat back so Tom can seat in front of you.
Been:
What?
Ok teacher.
SCENE 5: IN ENGLISH CLASS
Every body looking for their book include
Been
Teacher:
(come in and say) take out yours book. Anyone doesn’t have need to stand up
Been
start to stand up but Tom give his book to her and stand up for her
Teacher:
(scream) Why do you come to school for?
Tom:
(answer and smile) to see my friends of course
Teacher:
(scream) Get out of this class this instant!!!!
Tom:
(happily answer) thank you for saving me form this pain
SCENE 6: THE END OF GRADUTATION
CELEMONY
Tom:
(acts
cool and laughs)
Brave
your self, summer in comming
Slo:
(exited)
yessss summer
Dan:
(yell)
summer!!!!!
Chill:
(ask)
want
to go some where guys?
Been:
Where?
Chill:
I
think like a movie or the pool
Slo,
Tom, Dan:
(exited
yell)
pool
it it!!!!!!
SCENE
7: AT THE POOLS
Everyone
is at the pool and starting the summer
TOM:
aww
swimmimg pool
Chill:
Let
jump in
Dan:
yeah
Slo:
the
last one is a rootant fish
Been:
not
going to happen!!!!
SCENE 8: OUT SIDE THE SWIMMING POOL
Tom:
(talking
to Been)
Hey
you want to go somewhere alone so we can talk?
Been:
Sure
why not?
Tom takes Been to the park, they talk for a
long time about each other’s family, life.
Tom:
Hey
what do you think about me?
Been:
(blush)
ermm, I don’t know, I think you are cute and
fun to hang out with.
Tom:
Awww, do you really think of me like that?
Been:
Yes
I do!
Tom:
I
think you are cute too, I like you Been.
Been:
(speechless)
Tom:
Will you be my girlfriend?
Been:
(blush,
awkward)
That
would be a yes.
Tom:
(blush)
aww,
let’s go back it’s late
They go back to the pool and have fun with others.
SCENE 9: EXT. HOCHIMINH CITY - NOON
3 months later, Been has studied in Ha Noi,
Tom studied in HCM city. Oneday Tom open brawl and invite Been to his fight
TOM:
(ON
THE phone)
Been , how are you?
Been :
I’m
great? How are you?
Tom :
I
just open a fight compettion at school, wanna come?
Been :
Are
you crazy? What’s that for? Do you ever care about your self, your health, …..
Tom :
Yes
this is for exercise and good experience
Been :
Really?
Its good, you’re so immature.
Tom:
What?
Its just a game, whats a big deal ?
Been:
Ok.
I don’t know anything, do whatever you like. I don’t care about you anymore
(hung
up)
SCENE 10 : HCM CITY - DAY
TOM
CALLS
TOM
:
I
cancel the fight for you,
BEEN
:
Thanks
god I just arrived at HCM
TOM :
TOM :
good.
You wanna hang out?
BEEN :
Ok,
where do you want to meet? And when?
TOM:
Let’s
go to the park where I asked you out
BEEN
(Awkward)
Aww
that’s sweet, ok and when?
TOM:
Around
4 in the afternoon today, can you come?
BEEN:
Sure
I will come, don’t be late.
TOM:
I
know I’m not going to be late!
BEEN:
(awkward)
Ok
see you, I miss you
SCENE
11 – EXT. PARK. NOON
TOM:
(yelling
when he sees Been)
I’m
here Been!
BEEN:
(yells
back)
Come
here, I don’t want to go there.
TOM
(gives
Been a hug, whispers into Been’s ear)
I
miss you babe
BEEN:
I
miss you too boyfriend!
Tom
takes Been go around the city, they had a lot of fun
After 5 years, Tom
propose to been and live happily ever after
EXT. STREET – MORNING
TOM rides his bicycle and introduces
himself and his friend. TOM passes
DAN:
A beautiful morning
EXT. PHU MY HUNG. BUI BANG DOAN STREET
TOM
(Tom slaps Dan’s
head, laughing)
Morning Dude!
DAN:
(Pissed off voice)
Ma, thang cho
TOM
(Yell out loud)
Hahahaha, go to school fast bro.
INT. CAFETERIA - MORNING
TOM – CHILL IS EATING BREAKFAST – TOM PAST BY AND STEALS IT.
Tom
(laughing)
Hey let me eat it for you Chill!
Chill
(chase after Tom,
crying, screaming)
No give it back!
Tom
(Drive faster and
yell)
Drive faster or else I will eat
it all, BAHAHAHA
Chill
(angry yell)
Ma give it back Tom, I’m not
kidding
Tom
(driving faster)
See you at school
EXT. Around School
Slo throw a ball into tom’s head
Slo throws
a ball into Tom’s head
Tom
(pissed off scream)
Du ma! You are so going to die.
Slo
(run away)
Try it. HAHAHA
Tom
(chase after Slo)
If I catch you, you will die Slo
INT. CLASS - MORNING
Tom
(thinking)
everyone
in our group likes this girl Been, she’s kinda pretty though. We own have our
own way to flirt with her
Slo
try to impress her with his talent of basketball every day
Dan
tries to impress her with his weird technique and talent of playing music like
piano, etc
Chill
impresses by acting like an intelligent guy, a “sir”. Purposely forget his book
to borrow Been and invite to a concert.
And
me. I don’t flirt with her.
INT. IN MATH CLASS – MORNING
Tom, Slo, Dan, Chill play video
game in class.
Tom:
(whisper)
Hey, what round are
you guys on?
Dan:
(Whisper, answer)
5
Chill:
(whisper, answer)
2
Slo:
(Whisper, answer)
7
Tom: (whisper,
giggle)
10, Bitches
Teacher:
(angrily scream)
What is so funny Tom?
TOM:
(answer)
ermmm, nothing teacher
Teacher:
Come up here and find the X for
this problem Tom.
TOM:
(walking up the
board, circle the X)
Here is the X teacher.
Teacher:
(pissed)
Are you kidding me Tom? Go to
the principal office, NOW!
TOM:
Ok ok!
Tom walking
down the principal’s office and laughing, after few minutes, principal walks up
with Tom to the classroom.
PRINCIPAL:
(talk to the
teacher)
I want Tom to sit in front of
Been so she can take care of Tom and help him to be better.
TEACHER:
Ok! Been Move your bag one seat back
so Tom can seat in front of you.
BEEN:
What? Ok teacher.
IN ENGLISH CLASS – NOON
Every body looking for their book include
Been
Teacher
(come in and say)
take out yours book. Anyone doesn’t
have need to stand up
BEEN START TO STAND UP BUT TOM
GIVE HIS BOOK AND STAND UP FOR HER
TEACHER
(scream)
Why do you come to school for?
TOM
(answer and smile)
to see my friends of course
TEACHER
(scream)
Get out of this class this
instant!!!!
TOM
(happily answer)
thank you for saving me from
this pain
SCENE 2. THE END OF GRADUTATION CELEMONY- MORNING
TOM:
(acts cool and laughs)
Brace your self, summer in
comming
SLO:
(exited)
yessss summer
DAN:
(yell)
summer!!!!!
CHILL:
(ask)
want to go some where guys?
BEEN:
Where?
CHILL:
I think like a movie or the pool
EXT. AT THE POOLS - MORNING
Everyone is
at the pool and starting the summer, everyone jump in the pool.
EXT. THE SWIMMING POOL – LUNCH TIME
TOM:
(talking to Been)
Hey you want to go somewhere
alone so we can talk?
BEEN
(surely)
Sure why not?
Tom takes been to the park, they talk for a long time about
each other’s family, life.
TOM
(conferden)
Hey what do you think about me?
BEEN:
(blush)
ermm, I don’t know, I think you are cute and
fun to hang out with.
TOM
(sweet high voice)
Awww, do you really think of me like that?
BEEN
(Blush)
Yes I do!
TOM
(Blush)
I think you are cute too, I like
you Been.
BEEN:
(speechless)
TOM:
Will you be my girlfriend?
BEEN:
(blush, awkward)
That would be a yes.
TOM:
(blush)
aww, let’s go back it’s late
They go back to the pool and have fun with others.
EXT. HOCHIMINH CITY - NOON
3 months later, Been has studied in Ha Noi,
Tom studied in HCM city. Oneday Tom open brawl and invite Been to his fight
TOM:
(ON THE phone)
Been , how are you?
BEEN
(caring voice)
I’m great? How are you?
TOM
(happily)
I just open a fight compettion
at school, wanna come?
BEEN
(pissed
off)
Are you crazy? What’s that for?
Do you ever care about your self, your health, …..
TOM
(a
little pissed off)
Yes this is for exercise and
good experience
BEEN
(adult
vocie)
Really? Its good, you’re so
immature.
TOM
(angry)
What? Its just a game, whats a
big deal ?
BEEN:
Ok. I don’t know anything, do
whatever you like. I don’t care about you anymore
(hung up)
INT SCHOOL - NIGHT
THE
BRAWL BEGINS
TOM
(cool)
Let’s do this
Opponent
(conferden)
Yeah!!!
AFTER A LONG SHAME
FIGHT TOM FALL 3 TIMES THEN BEEN SHOW UP
BEEN
(poker
face)
………
TOM
(thinking)
She
comes!!!!
TOM STAND GOT
A K.O
BEEN
(Angry)
Are you some kind of idiot or
something?
TOM
(Happy)
No, this is fun!
Been
(RAGE)
You call this fun
TOM
(Yell)
Yeah!
BEEN
(angry)
We should break up!!!!
TOM
(not
thinking)
Yes. I was dumb to like u!!
TOM WALKS AWAY
BEEN
(cry)
Huhuh….huhuhu
TOM
(tears
on face)
…….
INT. AT HOME- MORNING
TOM TELL THE GUY
TOM
(sad)
Been and I
just broke up!
SLO
(Happy
and hang up)
Break up!
Yes I have a shot.
DAN
(talk
nicely)
I’m sorry,
don’t be depressed
CHILL
(make
TOM happy)
Look on a
bright side. You are free
TOM
(smile)
I guess so!
EXT. AT A PARK
AFTER TELL THE NEW DAN AND SLO
RACE TO BEEN PLACE. DAN DRIVE A MOTOR BIKE. SLO DRIVES A BICYCLE. DAN MEET BEEN
FIRST
DAN
(awkard)
So I heard
you break up with TOM
BEEN
(sad)
YES…hixhix
DAN
(Slowly)
I know you
going to a tought time but I all way like you, and willl… you been….. be…
my..girlfriend
BEEN
(Slowly
stop crying, knock her head)
THEN SLO ARRIVED AND SEE THE THE HOLE THING
SLO
(epic
face)
…..umm. huh?
INT. TOM’ HOUSE
SLO COME AND HIT TOM
SLO
(angry)
See what
you did there. Now the fat one got her
TOM
(hit
back)
Son of a
bitch!! So
SLO
(hit
back)
So that
make me feel epic fail.
TOM
(Laugh
and hit back)
You all way
fail at every thing!
THE TWO FIGHT FOR 1 HOUR AND THEY BOTH K.O EACH OTHER
INT. HOUSE - MORNING
TOM listen
to a sad song
TOM
(thought)
Been and
Dan only date for 4 month but it enough to make me jealous.
THEN AN EARTH QUAKE APPEAR. TOM RAN OUT THE HOUSE
TOM
(worry
call Been)
Pick up…
Pick up
BEEN
(worry)
I just
about to call you are you ok?
TOM
(relief)
Phew, I’m
fine.
BEEN
(smile
and awkward)
I thought I
can never see you again
TOM
(
low voice)
Why?
BEEN
(sexy
voice)
If you died
today who I’m I going to talk about our love.
TOM
(space
then smile)
I never
stop like u
BEEN
(Happy)
Me too.
Thanks for like me and make me happy.
INT. TOM HOUSE
AFTER 5 YEARS BEEN MARRIED AND THE BOYS IS AT TOM HOUSE
SLO
(Exited)
Don’t let the
bride wait!
DAN
(Happy)
Yeah
CHILL
(Happy)
Let’s go
TOM
(Happy)
Yeah
EXT. AT THE CELEMONY
BEEN WALK IN AN WHITE DRESS WITH THE BRIDE NEXT BY
TOM
(Though)
When you really like a girl when she married to another
person you still want her to live happly ever after
AFTER THE CELEMONY
CHILL
(happy
ask)
Can we give
a kiss to the BROOM?
BRIDE
(Awkward)
Sure but u
need to kiss this man first
TOM RUSS IN A KISS HIM FIRST THEN WALK TO BEEN
TOM
(flirty)
Can I have
this kiss now?
BEEN
(Happy
then smile)
….(wink)
THE END
First one
is Slo, this guy is a laziest one, he sleeps in all of his classes, but in the
other hand, he is really good at sports so yeah, not a big deal.
So the next
one is chill, this guy is super duper lazy, he only knows about games, he
failed the test so he had to stay in high school. But all the does is playing
games, what a failture
Name:
|
Tom, Perry, Daniel, Angella,
Dennis
|
Assignment:
|
Film Script
|
Date:
|
18 May 2012
|
Title:
|
The Girl We All Love
|
4 – Exceptional
|
3 - Capable
|
2 - Developing
|
1 - Beginning
|
|
Format = 3
|
Exhibits clear evidence of
having studied example script; few errors in capitalization, indentation,
punctuation, spacing
|
Clearly attempts appropriate format; occasional errors
in capitalization, indentation punctuation, spacing
|
Occasionally attempts
consistent format; multiple errors in capitalization, indentation,
punctuation, spacing
|
Does not attempt recognizable
format; no clear system of capitalization, indentation, punctuation, spacing
|
Narration = 4
|
Enhances the script overall by providing clear
description of setting, character’s actions and emotions, stage directions
|
Accompanies the scripts with
occasionally vague descriptions of setting, actions and emotions, stage
directions
|
Includes descriptions of
setting, actions and emotions, stage directions with multiple problems with
relevance and clarity
|
Does not include descriptions
or descriptions are completely incoherent and irrelevant
|
Dialogue = 4
|
Includes clear, compelling dialogue which both furthers
the plot of the film and illustrates characters clearly
|
Includes dialogue which
furthers plot and characterization with occasional problems with clarity and
relevance
|
Includes dialogue which suffers
from multiple problems with vagueness, irrelevance, incoherence
|
No dialogue included or
irrelevant, incoherent dialogue with seemingly no connection to plot or
characterization
|
Conventions = 3
|
Very few errors; little editing
required; conventions are used correctly and effectively overall; meaning
clear.
|
Reasonable control over standard conventions; spelling,
punctuation usually correct; grammar inconsistent.
|
Errors common but not
interfering with meaning; grammar conversational; simple conventions mostly
correct.
|
Repeated
errors make text difficult to understand; punctuation, capitalization random
or nonexistent.
|
Comments:
|
This isn’t a bad script. The
story is pretty clear and narration and dialogue work well together to tell
the story. The only real problems are the inconsistencies in format in
capitalization, scene labeling, etc. and the grammatical errors that could
have been caught with more careful editing.
|
Grade:
|
3 + 4 + 4 + 3 = 14/16 (88% B)
|
